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Crooked Timber
Something Awful

June 6th, 2007

08:34 am - Pointless positional competition
The campaign to make men feel as bad about their appearance as women continues, with this jaw-dropping website for a Philips razor. It claims, amongst other things, that "the Philips Bodygroom will make your cock look bigger". Obviously that's been implied by thousands of adverts over the years, but to come out and say it...

How can other companies compete with a slogan like that? I predict that in ten years time 80% of all advertising will promise increased cock-size.

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May 17th, 2007

10:28 am - Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die
Is this funny?

I laughed, but then I felt bad :(

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March 10th, 2007

03:25 pm - mp3 corner: a song about envy.
I switched on Radio 4 the other day, and this was on. Dear the Radio 4 comedy department: I know I've said some nasty things about you in the past, but if you commission more stuff like this, perhaps we can be friends again.

My Neighbour's Ass by Tim Minchin.

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March 1st, 2007

02:34 pm - Cooking is funny

"I saw him comin'!"

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February 9th, 2007

08:46 am - In an urban society everything connects
Are you having a good day? Why not completely spoil it by watching Threads, a film about a nuclear attack on Sheffield:

Show media Loading...

FACT: This film terrified the crap out of me when I was at school.

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February 7th, 2007

03:14 pm - Decadence

All-Bran Bran Flakes Chocolate

Doesn't covering a bran flake in chocolate entirely remove the point of eating bran flakes? This is just another sign that our civilisation is decadent. What next, sex nuns?

Top five signs of decadence most likely to result in a smiting from an angry God:

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February 6th, 2007

12:27 pm - If you could blow up the world with the flick of a switch, would you do it?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!

And if you could make everybody poor just so you could be rich, would you do it?

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!

(The live version on RapidShare is quite a bit more awsome than the video version)

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January 30th, 2007

06:35 pm - <insert cheap leg joke here>
The Guardian has a totally bizarre story about a woman who decided to cut off her leg, because "I simply cannot relate to myself with two legs: it isn't the "me" I want to be". The name for wanting to cut off one of your limbs is apparently body identity integrity disorder. I'm torn between sympathy and incredulity.

The best bit is when she complains that, oh, people are just so prejudiced towards people who like to cut off their own legs.

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January 29th, 2007

03:20 pm - Am I dead inside?
Have a look at this picture (warning: NSFW, apparently). I posted a link to it here as part of a light-hearted joke at the expense of Eric Raymond, not thinking anyone would be more than mildly offended. Jack's horrified response ("Christ dude, that ESR picture is worse than goatse.cx") has made me wonder: is this picture actually really horrible, and I'm the weird one? Has the internet inured me to disgusting pictures? Am I dead inside?

Only you, the public, can decide.

Poll #916267 Am I dead inside?

How horrible is the picture?

It's the worst thing I've ever seen.
It's totally horrible and disgusting.
It's moderately horrible.
Meh. I've seen worse.
I like it!

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11:42 am - WTF?
I've said some nasty things about Linux developers in the past, but this is ridiculous: "On October 10, 2006, he [Hans Reiser] was arrested and subsequently charged with the murder of his wife, Nina Reiser". Honestly, if I'd had to guess which open-source icon would be charged with murder, I'd have said Eric Raymond [update: link is both horrible and NSFW].

A sensitive response from the comic Everybody Loves ESR.

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